"Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle." Bob Hope
"A hippie is someone who looks like Tarzan, walks like Jane and smells like Cheetah." Ronald Regan
"I never think of the future - it comes soon enough." Albert Einstein
"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on." Dean Martin
"An alarm clock is a device that wakes you up just in time to go back to sleep." Anonymus