Life quotes

Short funny life quotes:

Money will not buy happiness, but it will let you be unhappy in nice places.

Success consists of doing the common things of life uncommonly well.

If the sky is the limit, then what is space, over the limit?

A perfect method of adding drama to life is to wait until the deadline looms large.

Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.

Life quotes

Funny life quotes:

When people search for “Life Quotes” they are often looking for quotes about life. Why do the major search engines only give them hundreds of pages of commercial garbage about Life Insurance Quotes?

Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.

There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking.

It is a mistake to think you can solve any major problems just with potatoes.

Parents learn a lot from their children about coping with life.

Funny quotes and funny photo

A funny photo for funny avatars or wallpapers and funny quotes! Have fun!

Funny photo with funny life quotes-for funny avatars or wallpapers!Have fun!

What do you mean, my birth certificate expired?

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take a chance?

If your wife wants to learn to drive, don't stand in her way.

Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, where the heck is the ceiling?!

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

Funny photo and jokes

Funny photo and jokes about Christmas

A Funny photo with Santa Clause

Jokes:

 Who is never hungry at Christmas ?
The turkey - he's always stuffed !

Mum, Can I have a dog for Christmas ?
No you can have turkey like everyone else !

How do you tell the difference between tinned turkey and tinned custard?
Look at the labels!

A man went to a butcher's and saw that the turkeys were 90p a pound. He said to the butcher, 'Do you raise them yourself?'
'Of course I do,' the butcher replied. 'They were only 50p a pound this morning!'

Funny quotes

Funny quotes
Men are like bank accounts.Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

Son, if you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now quiet! They're about to announce the lottery numbers.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.

I told my wife that a husband is like a fine wine; he gets better with age. The next day, she locked me in the cellar.

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.